From the Dept. of Weird Stuff I've Done

OK, hold on to your hats, fair readers -- this tale is going to confirm me as a total FREAK.

T'was about 11:30 last night when the cell rang. T'was Jason, wondering if I wanted to do a 7-11 run. When have I ever passed on the chance to do that?

As I made my way 'cross Mass. Ave. at the corner of 13th Street, as I approached the curb a car wanting to make a right turn on red without stopping came to a screeching halt about 1 foot from my kneecaps. I stood there, looked at the car, looked down and pointed at the crosswalk that I was in, threw up my hands and went, "whaaaa???!!!???"

My almost-assassins were nonplussed. So I glanced back at the traffic light, which now had changed to green. Mind you, I was still standing in the street, my kneecaps facing off with this car's bumper. I demonstrated to the driver and her hapless passenger that maybe I wasn't going to move. I think their reaction was "what the fuck?!!" I could be wrong; maybe they said "funk".

Anyway, it being about 11:35 p.m. and me being too tired to think clearly enough to either decide to get mad & try to escalate this situation, or decide that I'd made my point and just walk away, I opted for the proverbial third way. I stepped up on the curb, turned my back to the car, and

pulled down my shorts and full-mooned the driver and her sidekick!

I looked back to see their reaction. I'm not sure they were shocked, or offended, or just grossed out (huh? I have a cute butt, right?) but they made their intended right turn, and that was pretty much the end of that.

Except that I was so surprised at myself I didn't quite know what to do. I was half-satisfied with myself, and half-freaked-out. I laughed nervously to myself, and then I decided that this was one of the coolest and most innovative things I've done in a while, which made me laugh out loud.

Stay tuned, folks, who knows what I'll do next??!!!!